Tag: motivation

Blog Frenzy – Day 30: Success

Meg Dowell2 Comments

Well, I met my own personal challenge. I bet you couldn’t blog for thirty straight days if you tried.

I’m sorry to say that you might not be hearing from me for a few weeks. I’m putting my computer in a temporary sleep mode at least until my AP tests are over, except for the research I still need to do for my speech. It’s not very likely that I’m going to pull off these A’s if I don’t ace all of my finals, so I’m really going to be pushing myself past my limits these next few weeks. Let’s just say I won’t be sleeping much.

I’m really hoping to get back to writing soon. It’s really been a struggle, not having the time or energy to let the creative side of my brain do its thing. I’ve been having a lot of doubts about my potential these past few weeks since I rushed through the end of my novel. Maybe that’s normal: maybe not. I really don’t know. I guess we’re just going to have to wait and see what my heart decides.

Goodbye for now, all (and by all, I mean all three of you). Finish these last few weeks strong. Turn off your computers, cell phones, and TVs. And whatever you do, don’t give up. Graduation comes a lot sooner than you think.

Love&hugs&temporaryfarewells, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 27

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I have good news, and I have bad news. I’ll give you the bad news first, since you don’t really care that much about my life (or so it would seem): I’m behind. Again. Darn you, Hulu. But the good news is that I talked myself out of auditioning for Glee (thank goodness), and even better: Kristin Chenoweth is coming back on the show tonight. This is so exciting. This means I definitely can’t skip it tonight.

Which brings us back to the bad news, meaning I’m going to actually have to do work today. Sigh.

I’m still not going to push myself to work on any novels for awhile. I’ve realized that it’s not really healthy to push yourself so hard at something you’re not even that great at. (Don’t try to talk me up here. We all know it’s true.) I guess I should just focus on everything else I have going on right now, instead of some fictional world with fictional disasters and names and solutions.

Yes, that’s my novel writing advice for the day: be realistic.

I’m still working on that list of books I want to read before I die. It’s coming along quite nicely. I think I’m up to about sixty now, which doesn’t really seem like a lot. But I don’t think I’m going to get sixty books for my eighteenth birthday. So It’s going to take some of my own money and a few birthdays and Christmases to add all those books to my collection. Which I’m not even going to have room for in my dorm. Unless I’m a good girl, and get to live in an apartment my last three years of school. That would be nice.

I haven’t figured out whether or not blocking out an entire schedule helps me get things done. I guess I should probably try it again, since it worked for one-and-a-half days last week (and I got an A out of those 1.5 days, thank you very much). It’s a little late to start now. I mean, it’s already 8:30.

But it’s not too late to eat breakfast. Om nom nom.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 24

Meg Dowell1 Comment

Well, it’s Saturday. And we all know what that means. That’s right: rain, five chapters of biology, and finally getting to these last scholarship essays. The way this one works is, you fill out the application online, paste your essays into the boxes, and submit it. Then they send you via e-mail all the things you’re supposed to send via snail mail, postmarked by the thirtieth. I can do this, right? I really hope so.

The next three weeks are going to be extremely busy, because I now have to start ultra-cramming for my first AP test on the 6th. That should be fun, right? I’m really going to have to push myself to get all this other stuff done, like writing my last speech, getting an A on my last math test, and studying for finals. And then comes all the fun stuff, like all the solos I’m going to have to sing, the Red & White concert (super fun, except I’m not even in it), and of course, graduation. But that’s not really fun. That’s just necessary.

But all this means that summer is almost here. I’m seriously in denial. I haven’t decided if I’m going to write two novels or read 25 books before I move into my (gasp) dorm. I could do both, but that would kind of be an overload. Sometimes I like reading more than I like writing. Sometimes I like writing more than I like reading. It all depends on how much I’m willing to make my brain work.

I’m still working on that list of books I want to read before I die. I should make it another list of 100, just to make you happy. There are so many good books I haven’t read, like all that old-fashioned literature that most people wouldn’t even think about reading for fun. I’m just that kind of nerd, I guess. But hey. If it wasn’t for my AP lit class, I never would have realized how funny Pride and Prejudice actually is. Especially the chapter when Mr. Collins proposes to Elizabeth. I had to write an analysis about that one, and it was probably the worst paper ever. But that’s all behind us now, isn’t it?

I should really start on those essays, before I get distracted by YouTube again. Seriously, I think that web site just needs to die. I hate it.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 20

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The funny thing about going back to your high school after you’ve “graduated” is how much more attention you get when you’re walking down the hallways than you did when you were actually going to school there. I got stopped by a security guard, two old choirmates, two teachers, and my guidance counselor—who just wanted to say “hey.” Well, thanks for the attention, but I’m on a mission. Let’s go back and time and do this when my mom isn’t waiting in the parking lot. How about three years ago? That would work just fine.

I did, however, get my giant scholarship packet turned in, as well as the letter of recommendation I need for this next scholarship due April 30th. I didn’t get as much done on them as I wanted to yesterday, so I’m either going to have to finish them today (during the time I blocked out for them in my wonderful schedule of schedule-ness) or wait until after my biology test is over. Because I shouldn’t even be doing this right now. I should be studying for my biology test. Yikes, I’m behind!

This is the main reason why I shouldn’t have focused so much of my attention on my novel the past five weeks. Don’t get me wrong: I’m glad I wrote it. It’s a decent story, one I would have driven myself crazy with if I didn’t get everything written down so fast. But I’m so behind on my schoolwork now that I’m going to be spending the next three days with my phone off, and most likely my computer too—after I’m done sharing my depressing life story with you—just so I can get the A I need on this test. I didn’t do as well on my comm quiz yesterday as I would have liked (7 out of 9 converrted to 25 points? Good luck with that). So I really need to buckle down these next four weeks.

In addition to my AP tests, which I’m going to fail if I don’t go by the $25 prep book I need. Even though I would love for my mother to pay for it, since she’s the one who’s making me take them. But no. I’m supposed to use my $20 Border’s card instead, and she’ll chip in the last $5. Wonderful. I guess Pendragon is going to have to wait.

I’m on a slightly-not-as-tight-as-yesterday-but-still-excessively-structured schedule from now until I go to sleep (at 10:30) so I’ll talk to you guys tomorrow, after I’ve completely lost my mind. Unless that’s already happened. Then I’d appreciate it if you would let me know ASAP. Maybe they’ll give me a scholarship for that.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 19

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The good news is, I’m almost free.

And by free, I mean free of all these stupid scholarships. Because I kicked myself about a thousand times yesterday, wrote those essays, and filled out the right forms. And once I make an out-of-the-way trip back to high school today, I’ll be that much closer to being finished with all of them. Not counting the stuff I’m turning in later, I have exactly two left. One of the reasons I’m making this trip is to pick up one last letter of rec. Finally.

Don’t get me wrong: I still really hate talking about myself. And writing about myself. Seriously, why can’t someone else to it? There are plenty of people I know who probably know me better than I know myself. And they probably wouldn’t be so shy to point out how awesome they think I am. Even though I’m not. But that’s not the point. The point is that it isn’t really fair that they have to go and make this process so long and difficult. Just give me money! Why do I have to suffer just to get a good education?

This week is going to be spent catching up on biology and math. And studying for my test. I also have to start doing research for my career speech next month, because I want to have that thing written at least two weeks in advance. I got a ton of points taken off last speech because of my delivery, which was because I didn’t prepare nearly enough. No, I did not write it the night before. We’re changing the subject now.

I actually woke up when my alarm went off. On a Monday morning. Normally, this doesn’t happen. But it’s not even seven thirty, and I already have a load of laundry in, am getting ready to study for my quiz later today, and I’ve written out a tightly blocked schedule on note cards to ensure that I get everything done and more that I need to before bedtime.

I’m not crazy. Just making up for lost time.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 18: Mission Accomplished

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Final word count: 80,309. Final chapter count: 34. Final page count (8.5×11, 12-point Tmes New Roman font, double-spaced): 243. But it’s not about the length: it’s about the content.

And honestly, I’m going to admit that I’m not completely satisfied with the last chapter, and think I may have rushed through it a little bit. I feel like the story’s whole purpose wasn’t even addressed in the final moments of Melanie’s narration. But I have a thousand other things to do, and if and when there comes a time when I find myself bored and looking for a task, I will go back and add in what I must. But if I don’t get these essays done and proofed, I’m not going to college. And that’s a problem.

I won’t start the next book, Mirror Image, until after finals. Because finals are the end of May’s craziness. We won’t even think about the ACT in June just yet. Because first (obviously) comes these last seven scholarships, which I am determined to get out this week, even though they’re not due until April 30th (and one due on May 7th). I need to get them off of my floor, out of my head, and into the hands of the nice people who should continue being nice and give me some money.

I think AP tests are next. That should be fun to study for, right? Wrong. Career research presentation. NHS induction ceremony (at which I finally get my cords, thank you very much), some wrap-up thing for Tri-M I’m sure they’re going to schedule without my consent, voice recital, and finals. And you would think I could do it all, and I will, but something’s going to have to go. Thankfully, it won’t be this novel. Because I’m finished. Maybe I’ll just have to give up sleeping. Because I also have to pull my two B’s up to A’s before the end of the semester, or all my hopes and dreams of starting GPA fresh will be worthless.

I can’t stop posting daily blogs until April is over, because I’m challenging myself to do twelve more days of constantly boring you with my boring life. But I can’t promise another Frenzy next month, because my life is on the line here. I really shouldn’t have spent all this time writing an 80,000 word novel, yet I did. So it’s time to play catch-up, and nobody’s going to help me. I’m on my own, here.

If I tried to make a list of all the things I have to get done when we get back from church, I might explode, and you might explode, and this ongoing theme of people exploding is really starting to worry me a little. So I’m just going to go spend some time with Jesus, and then I’m going to come home. And when I come home, I won’t just think about all the stuff I have to do, I’m going to do it. Starting with writing all these essays about how awesome I am. Why do they make us talk about ourselves like we’re royalty? I don’t get it.

Also, I’m not that awesome. Ask anyone.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 17

Meg Dowell1 Comment

73,700.

There is no doubt in my mind that I will be finishing this novel today. We have finally made it back to Monday, the last day we’ll be hearing from Melanie for awhile (I haven’t decided whether or not she’ll narrate another book—we’ll just have to see how things go). I’m estimating anywhere from four to six thousand more words, if all goes well. These next few chapters are where I’m going to have to bring everything full circle, wrap up all the loose ends, and toss out a few more surprises. And reveal a few lingering mysteries.

There is no doubt in my mind that I will be finishing this novel today because I absolutely have to finish this novel today. This weekend I also have to read two comm chapters, write five to six scholarship essays, and read/take notes on three biology chapters. That’s how behind I am. So if I don’t finish this thing today—like, this morning—I’m going to be in a world of hurt tomorrow and Monday morning.

So I’m going to have to figure out a way to keep myself from getting distracted. Which means I’m probably going to have to turn off my cell phone, and Facebook, and etcetera. I’m not looking forward to doing all this work, but I also now have an 85% in my communications class, and there aren’t many assignments left to pull my grade up. If I get a perfect score on everything else we do, I’m good. But I honestly don’t think that’s possible. Unless I want to fail this upcoming biology test. Which I don’t.

Now that I’ve told the world I’m finishing this thing today, the fear of disappointing the (two) people that read this blog should be enough to motivate me to reach my goal. So I’m looking forward to titling tomorrow’s post “Blog Frenzy – Day 18: I Win. Or something like that.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 16

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My word count is something over 71,000, but I don’t remember the exact number. Even more depressing, I’m way too lazy/tired to go look it up. Which, really, would only take a total of three clicks. When I’m too tired to click three times, we officially have an issue.

I would like to be sleeping, please. Under the covers, with the windows open. But no. I had to be dumb and sign up for an all-day nine o’clock class. I don’t really care that there are only five (or four) weeks left. I don’t think I can do this five more times. Seriously, it might kill me. You think I’m kidding.

I would also really like to finish this novel today. I can’t promise that’s actually going to happen, but it would be really great if it could. I have a ton of other things to do besides force myself to write.

Sorry about the short post. I really need to find a way to wake up in the next half hour.

Love&hugs, Meg♥

Blog Frenzy – Day 15

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69,921.

Why did I stop there, you ask? Because writing when you’re tired is a very bad idea. Words start getting into places they don’t belong, and synonym choices start repeating themselves without you even noticing, and everything just starts falling apart. And yes, I realize that I had from three o’clock to ten o’clock to write about 3,000 words. But I lacked the necessary motivation to do so. So I stopped just short of 70,000 words, which was probably a good idea, because the part of Chapter 29 that I’m about to add in takes a lot of brain power to kick into gear. So let’s go kill some snow people (please don’t ask).

My word of the day is satisfactory, because we spent a good portion of my communications class yesterday talking about the difference between satisfactory and unsatisfactory, like how in elementary school we used to get E’s, S’s, and U’s. I never got one U. So ha.

Yesterday was a very satisfactory day. Actually, it was more  than satisfactory: it was beijing. And if you didn’t already know, that means it was amazing. I would tell you all the reasons why, but that might take three days. And that would be wrong and terrible in so many ways. So I’ll just pick out three main reasons why yesterday, April 14th, was the best day I’ve had in the history of ever a very long time.

I got my NHS hours fixed. And by “fixed,” I mean I now have eighteen hours entered into the system, when I really only needed sixteen. This means that (though I will still be nice and layout the invitations) if I don’t want to, I never have to do another act of service again. Don’t get me wrong: I like helping people. But there’s something about an hour requirement that makes volunteering a lot less satisfactory. Anyway, all I have to do now is show up to the last meeting, show up to the ceremony, and pick up my cords.

I found a roommate. Very exciting, if I do say so myself. It’s another thing to cross off the list, of course. And what’s better than a roommate who likes Gilmore Girls, writing, and being awesome? Nothing! So thank you, Olivia, for being awesome. I will see you soon.

And finally:

I got a cookie. But not just any cookie: a smiley-face cookie. Because my mother-dearest loves me so much, and had to order my brother’s birthday cookies anyway. So while she was in there, she thought, “Well, I guess I should get my favorite daughter a cookie.” And I ate it, and it was yummy.

I hope today is just as satisfactory as yesterday. And I hope yours is, too. And I hope I can get to 73,000 words. And I hope I don’t explode submerged in all this hope.

Love&hugs, Meg♥