10 Ways to Properly Insult a Writer

1. Call them names for some reason. Like, why not?

2. Assume things about them you couldn’t possibly know are true.

3. Point out every little flaw in their work. Go ahead. It’ll be fun.

4. Find a way to disagree with them on everything. After all, you must know more than they do on every subject.

5. Base your comments off the title of their work without reading any further.

6. Use big words. You’ll totally impress them and show them how smart you are.

7. If you can’t say something nice, keep tweeting.

8. Attack their friends. Their family. Their fur children. Somehow, they probably deserve it.

9. If they don’t respond, YELL LOUDER.

10. Go on reading and criticizing them/their work. Hey, at least you’re giving them pageviews.

Meg is the creator of Novelty Revisions, dedicated to helping writers put their ideas into words. She is a staff writer with The Cheat Sheet, a freelance editor and writer, and a 10-time NaNoWriMo winner. Follow Meg on Twitter for tweets about writing, food and nerdy things.

Help Novelty Revisions become a more valuable resource for aspiring writers. Join us on Patreon.

Responses

Don Massenzio

Jun 3, 2018

Reblogged this on Author Don Massenzio and commented:
Check out this post from the Novelty Revisions blog with 10 ways to properly insult a writer.

Reply
Liv Miles

Jun 3, 2018

Lol! Damn girl, some people are just amazing!

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1. Meg Dowell
  
  Jun 4, 2018
  
  :)
  
  Reply
Woebegone but Hopeful

Jun 3, 2018

And they get the ‘Sympathy’ vote too!
(On an tenuously linked point Frank Zappa was once walking past a music venue and saw the audience streaming out in disgust, he thought ‘Any band that gets that reaction must have something’. And met with the then unknown Alice Cooper)

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1. Meg Dowell
  
  Jun 4, 2018
  
  I lovvvve that story. I honestly feel like some people are just threatened by confidence. I feel weird writing that, but, I’ve noticed the better I feel about a piece, the more people seem to try to bring me down. They can try. :P
  
  Reply
  1. Woebegone but Hopeful
    
    Jun 5, 2018
    
    You keep on keeping on Meg.
    There is a miserable, small, sewer dwelling lesser caste of folk who have such sterile lives this is all they are capable of.
    This is why I do like WP where the air is fresher and writers support each other.
    The most important thing you are doing is writing. To write (leaving out the hate-mongers and the puerile pornographies) is to play a part in enriching the culture of the world around you. Once a person has written something and posted or published it, that work then achieves a place in the grander scheme of history and leaves the message ‘I was there. I achieved this!’
    Never give up writing Meg, the world today and tomorrow calls to you.
    All the best
    Roger
Lisa

Jun 6, 2018

11. Start with a compliment and follow it with a ‘but’…
We could probably keep this list growing for quite a while, right?

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1. Meg Dowell
  
  Jun 6, 2018
  
  Ooh that’s a good one. I mean, yeah, gimme what y’all got. I’ll make a master list into a pretty poster for Patreon supporters. ;)
  
  Reply
indiefan20

Jun 15, 2018

How about, ‘show how articulate you are by misspelling almost every single word. Preferably while using unnecessary capitalization. “U R WORSE RITER EVAR!!!” LOL :)

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1. Meg Dowell
  
  Jun 15, 2018
  
  THIS IS TOO REAL. IT HURTS! :)
  
  Reply